Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Just thinking....

I have been having a bit of a time of late with all the preparations for Graduation. I have been working hard on finishing the scrapbook for Bugg's life. I do recommend that no one wait til the last 3 months before graduation to start one! Her new relationship that is "promised", her idea of moving to Eugene with a girlfriend and going to school there, the whole graduation thing....

It just has overwhelmed my thinking these last few days and weeks. We attended the Mother~Daughter Tea last night for Senior Girls. Mrs. Hall, the hostess, was funny and engaging of the audience, but she brought up a point about what graduation really means. It is that push/pull that we do to our girls at this age. We have prepared them for the world, go out and conquer it! BUT, don't leave me, stay right here by my side as you do it. She used the analogy of the Velveteen Rabbit, which most of us have read a time or two. It was so thought provoking...becoming real. To each other and to ourselves. I thought about what I want for my daughter as she prepares for this final "rite of passage" and I thought about what I didn't do for her. What things I should have done better or could have changed. What I wished would have been but wasn't. What I wanted for her and what she received.

Did I do my best? I did the best I knew how to do. The rest,I leave to God. Which from the beginning I thought I had promised Him that He could have her, but I wonder if I ever did let go, so that He could. Now, it's His turn. I have no other options, but to leave her in His arms and know that she will always have my love.

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